Merrick's one year.

I cannot believe a whole year has gone by. Time has FLOWN.  We had Merricks birthday party, ice cream themed. It was really cute, thanks to my bestie Jessica. She has so much talent its ridiculous. We also were able to get one year photos done by another friend named Traci, They came out amazing!!

Take a look:

Merrick Lewis McGowen

Look at that face! So sweet.

Finley was so excited to jump in the photos.

I love the happiness on her face. Its so vibrant.

My little one walking before hitting the one year mark.

You can see how much he looks like Mike in this photo.

Momma's boy. 

Adorable right?! But through the planning of the party, and the trips to Utah. I took so many moments to sit and watch my little boy. How much he has grown from giving birth to him. I remember when he was born and he wasn't breathing right away. I was so scared, for him. I didn't want to loose him. And when he went in for observation for a day because he was having respiratory issues, my heart went into my throat, and I couldn't help but worry. Even though he had just come into this world. I loved him so deeply. It was irrefutable how much I adored him. He's always been a momma's boy and a snuggler, Finley was different. As Merrick turned one year old. I couldn't help but think of what was in store for my little boy. He is so much like his dad. Sweet, patient, loving, calm. He is such a joy.

I wrote a poem for my children, but I think I'll share it here. Its not much but I'm hoping to improve. 

Never Have I Loved Another:

I watch you grow, 

I see you learn.

And I fly.

You give me meaning, 

I have hope, unwavering hope.

It will last forever.

Never have I loved another.

Your joy is my joy.

Your pain is mine.

Never have I loved another.

I see you,

All of you...

And it is beautiful.

You are stunning.

Beaming like starlight in my hands.

You are stirring, caught up in movement

Yet, you stand so still.

you are rushing water, but a stagnant stream.

You stop and think.

And you soar.

All in the same moment.

Never stray to far for me, for I fear I would break.

My love is yours forever.

Never have I loved another as deeply as I love you.

From before the womb, I knew you. 

As I hold you in my arms, I treasure you.

I hold on to the stillness that is you.

I ache while you grow. 

Longing for you,

But I am like a sail with full wind 

I ascend with you.

All in an instant. 

Your eyes hold so much wonder, 

your heart is full of love. 

No matter where you go,

I will be there.

Inside...

In heart..

In mind.

Never have I loved another so meaningful as you.

Never have I loved another so willingly till you...

Happy birthday to my little one.